Life Documentation

17 December 2005, Saturday

Early day. Headed to school for a morning swim. Haven't been exercising for the longest time. *super fat now. sob!* It was great. A whole Olympic sized pool to yourself. Yeah man... *cheers!* Returned my library books and borrowed some new books. Yes, I found many books, photocopied many information. BIG problem: I haven't read any? *hahaha. I am truly a PIG!*

Took some time off and met up with my JC mates. It has been quite some time since I've met up with them. Why? 1) I have no life. My life = school. *sad to say. I have no time even for myself* 2) Everyone is busy too. *I assume. Haha* 3) We are all leading different lives. *NS and school? Yup* Went to Settler's Cafe (Holland V) and I must say although their food isn't the greatest, nor the atmosphere.. but it was still really good to have gatherings there. Because each of us are so caught up in our own lives now, there is so little in common to talk about at times. And each time after dinner, we always find ourselves not knowing what to do next. But at Settler's... fret not!! BOARD GAMES!! Yes... The good ol' board games.

And so we played Galloping Pigs over soup. Zombies over main course. And... TABOO! While waiting for dessert and over dessert *chocolate ice cream!! Haha.. yes i know. sinful...*Had a really great time. Hope to go back there again.. :) *anxiously waiting*

19 December 2005 Monday

New week. New day. After that horrible Friday I had.. Things were a bit better. At least I enjoyed playing with some of the kids.

I really find it SO unfair that we are being judge on communication skills. I mean.. come on! Not everyone is born with fantastic communication abilities, who can melt anyone's heart or read your mind with their impressive vocalisations and super hearing. I AM THE LIVING EXAMPLE. I have poor.. or should I say NO communication skills. I just DON'T KNOW how to alright? Which part of "don't know" do you not understand? *Fine! just dx me with ASD!*

And who should judge whether you are good at communicating or not? That's like so.. egocentric? Judging another using your own yardstick. I mean... how should you know whether you have good communication skills? As if someone will tell you "You suck at interacting with others." -_-""" I really hate this. And the longer I am at the place.. the more I feel that something is very wrong with me. Perhaps I really do have a problem - ASD-NOS. *haha.. my own Dx*

I don't like to dislike. But look...how can I not?

18 December 2005 Tuesday

Bad start. VERY bad start. First day with a new s _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ *again. what's new????* 8am I received a call. Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad.. VERY.

"Didn't I not make myself very clear in the briefing that we will be observing you guys in a session. Do u not understand intructions? How else are we going to evaluate you?" [contents have been slightly altered due to the writer's failing memory to recall the event exactly.]

8 in the morning! Can you believe that!! I'm really starting to get really fed-up with things. I don't know how long more I can take all these 'nonsense' but I hope I can last for another one more week. 8 more days *wu-sahhh.... goooseeeefraaabaaa*

1. If you know that the place itself has their own problems, why did you even bother to consider it in the first place?

2. Okay, so you are desperate. So have you EVER considered about others? Do you know how disruptive the whole thing is? And that its such a torture to feel that you are such a B.U.R.D.E.N.? Each and everyday others have to worry for you (as if they have nothing better to do), organise things out because of you (sure, they will have time. yar right.)... etc. etc. etc. And better still, talking in front of you as if you never existed (_ _ _ _ _ _ _? who's that?). Now how does that feel? Well.. I'm VERY sure you have NEVER thought about it. Oh.. perhaps you never even bothered. 'Oh goodie. One more down. I don't care what will happen there'. *BLEAH*

3. Fine. I have developed a high tolerance for nonsense since mid-2004. Okay. The final numbers won't be affected. Context will be taken into consideration. Oh sure. 4 weeks... 20 days... 200 hours...12,000 minutes. And exactly what is 45/12,000? Oh yes yes.. things will be taking into consideration. 45/12,000.. wow. So representative ya? Wonderful. Absolutely. I'm amazed by them. As always, they never fail to do s _ _ _ _ _ things... and not forgetting.. Last minute things too. And have you ever thought.. what IF the 45 never even existed? That's like.. 0/12,000? Wow.. the world is surely very FAIR right? Numbers won't be affected... *someone convince me. there is no way I'm going to believe that like a 3 year old kid*

4. And shouldn't things be the SAME? Why is it different even among yourselves. Wow.. so FAIR ya? Amazing job done. *Anyone care to applause for them.. after all that hard word? I will.. for all the s********y and n******e. Thanks.*

I am lost. I am confused. I am tired. I am a burden. I feel bad even though its really not my fault. Most importantly, I am angry. mad. infuriated.

Oh yesh.. a note to ZQ and Ocean72... I keep meeting Dinosaur [a.k.a. pomp pomp] and Toad. Just my luck. *Bleah*

Life Documentation

17 December 2005, Saturday

Early day. Headed to school for a morning swim. Haven't been exercising for the longest time. *super fat now. sob!* It was great. A whole Olympic sized pool to yourself. Yeah man... *cheers!* Returned my library books and borrowed some new books. Yes, I found many books, photocopied many information. BIG problem: I haven't read any? *hahaha. I am truly a PIG!*

Took some time off and met up with my JC mates. It has been quite some time since I've met up with them. Why? 1) I have no life. My life = school. *sad to say. I have no time even for myself* 2) Everyone is busy too. *I assume. Haha* 3) We are all leading different lives. *NS and school? Yup* Went to Settler's Cafe (Holland V) and I must say although their food isn't the greatest, nor the atmosphere.. but it was still really good to have gatherings there. Because each of us are so caught up in our own lives now, there is so little in common to talk about at times. And each time after dinner, we always find ourselves not knowing what to do next. But at Settler's... fret not!! BOARD GAMES!! Yes... The good ol' board games.

And so we played Galloping Pigs over soup. Zombies over main course. And... TABOO! While waiting for dessert and over dessert *chocolate ice cream!! Haha.. yes i know. sinful...*Had a really great time. Hope to go back there again.. :) *anxiously waiting*

19 December 2005 Monday

New week. New day. After that horrible Friday I had.. Things were a bit better. At least I enjoyed playing with some of the kids.

I really find it SO unfair that we are being judge on communication skills. I mean.. come on! Not everyone is born with fantastic communication abilities, who can melt anyone's heart or read your mind with their impressive vocalisations and super hearing. I AM THE LIVING EXAMPLE. I have poor.. or should I say NO communication skills. I just DON'T KNOW how to alright? Which part of "don't know" do you not understand? *Fine! just dx me with ASD!*

And who should judge whether you are good at communicating or not? That's like so.. egocentric? Judging another using your own yardstick. I mean... how should you know whether you have good communication skills? As if someone will tell you "You suck at interacting with others." -_-""" I really hate this. And the longer I am at the place.. the more I feel that something is very wrong with me. Perhaps I really do have a problem - ASD-NOS. *haha.. my own Dx*

I don't like to dislike. But look...how can I not?

18 December 2005 Tuesday

Bad start. VERY bad start. First day with a new s _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ *again. what's new????* 8am I received a call. Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad.. VERY.

"Didn't I not make myself very clear in the briefing that we will be observing you guys in a session. Do u not understand intructions? How else are we going to evaluate you?" [contents have been slightly altered due to the writer's failing memory to recall the event exactly.]

8 in the morning! Can you believe that!! I'm really starting to get really fed-up with things. I don't know how long more I can take all these 'nonsense' but I hope I can last for another one more week. 8 more days *wu-sahhh.... goooseeeefraaabaaa*

1. If you know that the place itself has their own problems, why did you even bother to consider it in the first place?

2. Okay, so you are desperate. So have you EVER considered about others? Do you know how disruptive the whole thing is? And that its such a torture to feel that you are such a B.U.R.D.E.N.? Each and everyday others have to worry for you (as if they have nothing better to do), organise things out because of you (sure, they will have time. yar right.)... etc. etc. etc. And better still, talking in front of you as if you never existed (_ _ _ _ _ _ _? who's that?). Now how does that feel? Well.. I'm VERY sure you have NEVER thought about it. Oh.. perhaps you never even bothered. 'Oh goodie. One more down. I don't care what will happen there'. *BLEAH*

3. Fine. I have developed a high tolerance for nonsense since mid-2004. Okay. The final numbers won't be affected. Context will be taken into consideration. Oh sure. 4 weeks... 20 days... 200 hours...12,000 minutes. And exactly what is 45/12,000? Oh yes yes.. things will be taking into consideration. 45/12,000.. wow. So representative ya? Wonderful. Absolutely. I'm amazed by them. As always, they never fail to do s _ _ _ _ _ things... and not forgetting.. Last minute things too. And have you ever thought.. what IF the 45 never even existed? That's like.. 0/12,000? Wow.. the world is surely very FAIR right? Numbers won't be affected... *someone convince me. there is no way I'm going to believe that like a 3 year old kid*

4. And shouldn't things be the SAME? Why is it different even among yourselves. Wow.. so FAIR ya? Amazing job done. *Anyone care to applause for them.. after all that hard word? I will.. for all the s********y and n******e. Thanks.*

I am lost. I am confused. I am tired. I am a burden. I feel bad even though its really not my fault. Most importantly, I am angry. mad. infuriated.

Oh yesh.. a note to ZQ and Ocean72... I keep meeting Dinosaur [a.k.a. pomp pomp] and Toad. Just my luck. *Bleah*